France vs Rwanda: Which will stop the boats? https://www.thedailymash.co.uk..../politics/france-vs-

F**k you! We’re off on a term-time holiday ONE week to go until the end of summer term and go f**k yourself, schools! We’re off on a term-time holiday!
https://www.thedailymash.co.uk..../news/society/fk-you

6Music always jizzing its pants about bullshit https://www.thedailymash.co.uk..../news/arts-entertain

We ask you: what event are you pairing with this weekend’s alcohol? BLAZING sun compels every Briton to indulge in alcohol at an event designed for same, whether called ‘Trudy’s wedding’ or ‘Glyndebourne’. What’s yours?
https://www.thedailymash.co.uk..../news/alcohol/we-ask

iPhone convinced you want to commemorate Battle of the Boyne YOUR iPhone has, for the 15th consecutive year, reminded you that all your other appointments come second to celebrating the Battle of the Boyne.
https://www.thedailymash.co.uk..../news/science-techno